In the course of our lives we are socially conditioned to behave in certain ways which sometimes tends to go against our inherent human nature. This is more pronounced in Eastern societies where humility and politeness are synonymous, some to the extent of self depreciation.
Now when we are self depreciating, even if it is a show of politeness it is still a string of negative words even if not followed by negative thoughts. By this act alone we begin to condition ourselves subconsiously that we do not deserve. In time this message is passed onto every part of our physical, mental, emotional and etheric anatomy. All of us have hopes and dreams and lots of us read, watch and are involved in self help programmes in order to help us attain what we desire. All such programs prescribe being positive however most do not warn us that self depreciation whether in thoughts, words or deeds is what lets us down and that is how we manage to self-sabotage whatever we want to attain.
One of the things I have observed this last holiday season was the fact that most adults tend give gifts with great enthuisasism but receive gifts mumbling “you really shouldn’t have”, as they cover in embarassment. I love receiving gifts but I too for a while have been a mumbler of “shouldn’t have”. I have no idea why or when I started to do this for I am sure every adult human has the same reaction to receiving gifts as a child does. Every child craves receiving gifts. Perhaps its the fact that they were in greater realms recently where there is no shame in receiving.
I am sure in the unseen worlds or heavens reciving and giving are taken for granted. There must be gratitude but no shame or scheming on how to outdo gifts or re-gift or even the pressure of gifting a finaicially equivalent gift. When a child opens a gift no matter what its financial value its a matter of jumping up and down with joy, and tearing off gift wrapping with hands quivering with excitement, utterances of whoops of uncontrolable whoops of joy while tossing wrapping paper aside to discover the wonders that hide inside.
When did it become socially acceptable to mumble “you shouldn’t have”? Is that not hurtful? Hurting someone is something that should be unacceptable. Why shouldn’t someone who wants to give you a token of love, respect, friendship, thank yous and forth ‘not have’? Most personal gifts mean so much more then their intrinsic value. To me they automatically mean someone cares as they have taken the time, effort and money to get me something that I like or that may mean or signify something to me. Isnt that an honour not something to be ashamed of?
Although it is quintessential to teach our children “it is in giving that we receive”, we must not fail in educating them of the natural pleasure there is in receiving as well. Children should be taught how to receive with as much grace, gratitue and appreciation.
It is a fact that there is a natural give and take in life just as for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. When I first became a holistic therapist I learnt a very important lesson on the importance of receiving. I was told that the reason that healers and therapists charge is due to natural law of give and take. If one provides a service and does not take anything in exchange or does not feel they deserve to take anything then the forces that be do note that the service provider has been plentifully blessed and begins to deduct from the person who has plenty with the excesses be it from their finances, relationships and/or even health.
This is one of the reasons why I have changed my attitude to receiving. I love to give but I am also honestly very happy to accept and receive these days, whether it be gifts, compliments or time from my friends, relatives, collegues or teachers. Although I do tend for the most part to refrain from jumping up and down while receiving he gift I do let my emotions of joy and gratitude show.
If the gifts of the three wise men we received with gratitude, grace and pleasure lets make that the template on how to give and receive gifts as that is the significance for exchanging gifts at Christmas.
I request you all to change your attitude to receiving. Let us all make this the year we receive as much as we give be it love, happiness, money, gifts, a sympathetic ear, a smile or whatever we can give or receive.
Gods Bless and a Happy New Year to you all from the Healing Boutique.